Tiny Tragedies

My congresswoman, Gabrielle Giffords, was shot today. She remains in critical condition. A number of other people died in this shooting.

She was always visible in the community. She put on so many military academy help days which is what I personally would know her best for. To apply to an academy is a multistep process involving an elected official, congress or senate, to sponser you. She always put on programs to help us high schoolers. She was shot while doing 'Congress at the Corner' or something to that affect. Basically, she was getting to know people right near where I live.

Not only are the deaths and injuries tragic.
What does it mean though?
Are they going to start attacking gun laws?
Will we never see any of our elected officials anymore?

I love seeing my elected officials and getting to know them. Just recently we had a woman politics day at my school and so many people of both parties came and we got to meet them and it was amazing.

I have always had an affinity for politics.

I'm not saying the programs are more important than lives because preserving people and their welfare is the most important thing in the world, that's just a given. This is just things that aren't being addressed yet and will only be shown in the future.

We painted our indoor percussion mat today. It was weird though, not hearing about Giffords until lunch break. It was weird thinking that about half an hour away, a place where I hang out sometimes involving a woman I've shook hands with.

On a guilty note, I had fun painting the mat and getting to know my fellow musicians.

Hopefully, we all become fairly close.

Unfortunetly, I was looking at the logisitics of my life for next year...

This is probably the last year I'll be able to be in a music group.

I mean, Fordham has a pep band and such but it seems weird as in, I have no idea how it works (there aren't any auditions) and what do I even play anymore? Mellophone? French horn? Trumpet? Percussion? And if I'm a percussionist, I play mallet percussion. Do they even have that in a pep band atmosphere and if I did concert atmosphere, I have never played auxillary percussion so, I'm useless.

Plus, I'll have other things going on... running, perhaps one day rifle team, ROTC, school in general, Circle K.

...and there isn't an indoor group closer than 2 hours away.

Yeah.

Well, first I suppose I should figure out this season's music and make it the best season ever.

On Turning 18 (Not Too Boring)

HAI JESSICA!!!!!!

Last night, I did my birthday party at Chili's with all my friends! It was interesting. All my parties are pretty awkward because I have a couple different groups that I hang out with and so they then must intermingle at one table but with a table of 20, it was okay.

One end was my 'Kyle Mutual Friend Side' and the other end was my band kids and then my 'normal' friends were dispersed through out.

Quite interesting!

I had fun despite being worried. I think I was a little weird though, Stempi said I wasn't 'normal Anne'. I asked him what 'normal Anne' was and he didn't have an answer so I think I was alright.

I hate Texas Cheese Fries, Fried Shrimp, and then bought 10 sundaes, so two people share. I thought that was happy!

Spend time with one of my best friends, Sara, who I barely get to see but we do talk everyday.

Now that I am legal I feel pretty much the same 'cept for now I have to be careful not to commit a crime...

Not that I was constantly committing crimes while I was underage.

So yeah, finals went alright. They were what I expected.

I am looking forward to a nice winter break and seeing some more of my friends, hopefully. I don't have a curfew anymore!

College Acceptance Update (Boring)

So, I officially got accepted to Fordham University. Before, I had just gotten my scholarships - a 4 year ROTC Army scholarship (which is tuition, spending money, and fees provided I pass my monthly physicals starting in July), and room and board award from the college (provided my GPA stays above a 2.5 or something like that).

I now have gotten actual letters from the school which is exciting. I'm not sure if I should send in my signed letters yet though. I'm still waiting for official acceptance from my state university of choice.

They sent me an email entitled, Happy Holidays! I almost didn't open it but at the bottom, in white text so I had to highlight to read, it said I had been accepted into the honors college.

I was really happy!

Yet, I was so confused. Was I accepted into the school? Would I be receiving paperwork anytime soon? Was I getting any money?

I had received a 4 year Army scholarship there as well but unfortunately, it can't be used with the other award I received from state testing so I would have to reject my state testing award. I was confused so I already revoked my state college's ROTC award to increase my Fordham acceptance rate.

By accepting Fordham ROTC before state ROTC, Fordham unofficially said they would evaluate my ROTC as a part of admission which was pretty nice of them, and I took them up on it which seemed like a smart thing to do.

So yes, the 18th most expensive college in the nation is essentially free to me.

My state college I would have to pay for a lot of things and they still aren't really being nice to me!

At one point, I needed an interview for something, and I called. No one answered. I called again. No answer. Again! No answer so what did I do? I dressed in my fancy clothes and just got off school early and drove to the university myself. They let me schedule but I had to again take time off to actually do the interview.

Ahh, the tears of frustration!

I just want a backup plan I guess and I don't know, I would be happy at either place.

I do have a backup plan though at a school that I have not only been accepted to out of state but is giving me enough money to be the cost of my state school so that's fun. Plus, I might be picked up for some sort of ROTC scholarship there. Probably not a four year, but a nice one.

In the spring, I apply for Fordam's, 'Fordham Plunge' which is a chance to go to Fordham a couple of days before orientation and work on 20+ community service projects in the Bronx and around New York! How awesome is that!

I am also looking at this study abroad program I would like to apply to if I go to Fordham. It is studying either WWII in London or doing a nonfiction writing course in London where you essentially journal about your cultural experience! Sounds like a fancy blog for a class credit to me.

The State of Being Awesome

When I want to know the real meaning of a word, I head to urbandictionary.

While the first definition for awesome is 'a word American's use too much' I felt that was too broad. Americans use a lot of words too much, like love and thank you, and while that makes them seem less important, their denotation still resonate.

I think there are a couple different definitions for awesome which is okay because a lot of words have more than one meaning in the dictionary.

One definition, the one that would be listed first, is something cool and exciting.

"That shirt is awesome because it lights up."
"That solo was awesome, you were the star of the show!"

Being awesome means being enjoyable and unique to the senses I think.

Actually being awesome is probably the second most used definition.

"You are awesome."

What does that mean?

It means you are wonderful. It means you add Technicolor to whatever context it's being used in.

Most of society is lonely, or so they say. Everyone has someone in their life that is wonderful though. Even though you have 43897598 people around you, they all fade into the background. In a sense, they are white noise.

Wonderful and awesome are the words for people who stick out. That could be your best friend or your worst enemy.

They add vibrancy.

Worst enemy you ask?

Well, you know when they enter the room and you're aware of their life in someway. They are a color in a sense, not a grey passerby. While they might not be wonderful, their personality strikes a chord with you and thus, they are more likely to stand out in other circles too, perhaps for the better!

So, in my theory, that I just came up with as I wrote this, enemies are closer to being your awesome companion than strangers.

I was inspired by the Liz.

Nostalgia

I rush home from school today thinking I am going to work on my online health class, that I need to graduate by the way, but instead I find myself doing the usual procrastination routine that is oh-so-comfortable. I found a couple of blogs that made me feel good. You know, the ones that are handwritten thank you notes daily or something like Cardboard Love. I guess I'm in one of those nostalgic moods.

I also read some nice long blog posts about people I've never met.

I kind of like seeing the tidbits of other people. I guess I'm just nosy like that. It's weird because when I write blogs I know that I always write the bare minimum and I wonder what things people have left out.

I would give examples of the type of exciting things I never mention but that would be defeating the purpose.

Sometimes, I wonder if I say too much. Not just when I write but when I talk to people. I almost like keeping secrets because it's cool to have something that no one else can taint - or that's what I tell myself anyway.

Okay, so I am not going to be attending an all girls college.

I got a four year ROTC scholarship to Fordham University and the school is going to be be giving me room and board.

New York for free! I don't think I could pass up such an amazing offer. Now, I just need to get in shape, again. I don't know, was I ever in shape. Anyway, it is perhaps 90 percent official. I need to still sign some paperwork and all that jazz.

I am not dissapointed at all.

Just, a little nervous. I am already missing somethings but looking forward to a lot of different adventures as well.

Thanksgiving was fun. I think the most accurate word would be cozy. I had to miss my friend's birthday party and my boyfriend's steel band concert.

That's fine, I have made plans to see Harry Potter with my friend and my boyfriend is in another ensemble that's playing this up coming weekend.

That's so weird to say, even after 5 months?, boyfriend. Haha, I have no idea why but it makes me giggle even to type it.

I am pretty immature :). Also, I am comforted by the fact that I don't think he finds blogs that interesting anyway!

Love

It is finally chilly here.

I don't know if that's good or not but I enjoy a change.

I was talking to someone today and I mentioned something about marching band and so they got me to start talking about what it was like being drum major.

I tell him a quick anecdotal story, barely scratching the surface about what that experience was like and he smiles and tells me I suddenly did not look stressed anymore.

I don't know if that was because I was talking about band or if the light simply moved to erase the wrinkles on my face but... I didn't say anything but smile.

We say goodbye and I am left wondering, did just talking about marching band really do that much to me? Did just thinking about it for a second make me that happy?

Band camp.
Zero hour.
Turf in my bed.
Percussion.
Brass.
Cold mouthpieces leaving tingly sensations until first period.
Squinting into the sun while conducting.
Tan lines on only one side of me from conducting.
Sore arms and back.
Sore feet.
Chafed neck.
Best friends.
Funny jokes.
Sweat.
The shade from my shako on a Friday night.
Amazing memories.
Great experiences.

I think I could fill up a novel.

It's weird because music programs across the district might have to be cut from elementary through high school. I understand why, I really do but I think I cried.

I made vibraphone for indoor percussion and I am going to do my best to live up to such an honor.

but man, I'm going to miss it.

Applying to an All Girls College

Many of my friends are surprised to hear of my interest in an all girls college. Even I am.

If you had told me last year I was applying early decision to Mount Holyoke, I wouldn't have believed you. I mean, just look at my previous post. I was set to go to a military academy! It's funny because I narrowed down my college choices to seven that I will be applying to and none of them are military academies. No Virginia Military Institute or the Citadel. Instead, I have schools like Smith College and Denison University on my list.

Well, whatever is supposed to happen will occur and I'll be happy either way.

That's something worth noting - I think whatever college I go to, I will be happy at. I am incredibly lucky that I have the opportunity to go to college as well! Granted, I'll only be able to consider the colleges I get an ROTC scholarship for, but still - how absolutely amazing is that!

I have three more colleges to finish applying to out of my seven.

I am almost done with two of them.

It's quite an exciting time as well as a super stressful one.

High school is definitely not what I would have thought it to be. Freshmen year was probably the best year but so far, high school is alright. Senior year is meh. It's like purgatory before getting to the next step of your life. You are just sitting around waiting.

Anyway, why was I writing this blog?

Girls college. Right. Got it.

Why do I want to go?

As my college admission essay for Mount Holyoke states, it's important to be able to articulate why you want to go.

Funny how that's the last thing left for me to do.

Why I Want to go:

1. It's an all girls college. This means 50 percent more girls than any other college AKA twice as many people to be best friends with!

2. It's not a party school. Some may find this a negative but those who know me would agree that it makes sense. Yes, I like having a good time but do I need craziness and loudness? No! I want to learn and be with others who want to learn!

3. It's part of the Five College Consortium. What does that mean? I can take classes and join clubs at four other institutions nearby and that include the University of Massachusetts!

4. UMass, as mentioned above, has one awesome percussion/mallets program that would be fun to try out for.

5. Have you seen Massachusetts and New England? Beautiful! I see photos and I am just thinking about the amazing hiking and running trails and I start salivating.

6. Traditions! Old private schools have a lot. A few of my favorite that I've read about include elfing and Mountain Day!

7. Small class sizes and discussions. Amen. Either Princeton Review or US World ranked them as the number one classroom experience.

8. This school keeps telling me it emphasizes writing and I had to send in a writing sample in the form of my work I've done for my current English class. I love writing and I love that they take it seriously!

9. They offer Russian. Not every college offers Russian.

Now, how to put all these in an intelligent sounding essay? Maybe, I'm not as great at writing as I thought ;).

Of course, if I don't get in it's not the end of the world. I would be completely happy at my state college as well! I am just keeping some doors open.

Later next week I'll be going to an information meeting at the state university I am most interested in.